Convenience of Time

'I am scared' he said, 'scared because perhaps in future, god forbid, there might come several moment when I will not be able to provide you with all the things you deserve. May be we left alone without home of our own and so no car not everything that a home possesses today. I earn less money now then I use to. I am not that well and happy anymore. I am going through a big trench caused by financial and mental crunch we suffered recently. Everything become inconvenient for us. At that moment I will need your hand to hold mine. You are the person i would believe in that bad time. If you would call me loser I will be shattered and kneel down in front of that situation to surrender and devour me. If you will say that we can get over with it together and you are with me, I would stand tall in front of the problem and soon attain victory over it. But I am scared that at such moment you will leave me. You will leave me on my own to fight alone with eveything. I am scared of being left alone by the one I believe in so much. Why, because the time is not that easy anymore? I am scared of such a time. I strongly feel some day may come when I will be broke. That time my love will the be worst and the best time for me. A woman can make man a winner or looser.'

She didn't say anything in reply. Because he said all of this to himself only.

A long forgotten Diary : A poem

A diary that got wet in the rain last night is drying fast..
I'm Wondering if I should make a trip to the memoir..
I turned a few pages with my left hand..
Ink has spread on the paper..
Like blue clouds in white sky..
Few words lost; even their impression gone from the paper..
I close my eyes to recollect what could have been written there..
On a few pages, even dates washed away..
I can't even identify them in my memories..
Butterflies playing in my heart; while I'm missing the old days...
And I am cursing myself..
What if I could have saved this diary from the rain last night..

Nothing Usual

The things I supposed, will happen..
Didn't happened.
That day nothing usual happened.
God must be on leave for a day or few..
Mother must be fed up of us, all..

I call that reality

During winters..
When I lay in my bed..
I only see stars in the dark sky..
I call them hopes..
When I feel cold..
And a sheet of leaves cover my body..
I call that care..
When I can't sleep..
Sweet breeze sings lullabies for me..
I call that love..
When I dont wake up in the morning..
Sun shines at my face..
I call that reality..

A helpless love

It was a usual morning and after breakfast he went to get ready in the bedroom. Where I was lying on one side of the bed. Looking at him, my mind started searching for old memories, how he used to pick me in his hands and in return how I would put my arm around his neck. But not anymore.

These are old sweet memories. But now, I am getting old. I am getting older every day every second. Just like a flower loose its fragrance after one night, I think my night is getting over. I cannot help it, can I? I would really want to. I want to be loved as old days. I want to be chosen before he choose anything else. I am with him, since very long. This is how she should be treating me now?